By Yaoharee Lahtee

In Islamic marriage, a Muslim husband may have the expectation that the husband is responsible for financially supporting the family, while the wife takes care of the household and children. However, these expectations do not always align and can lead to conflicts within the family.

Today, women are educated and employed, often contributing financially to the family. In Thailand, especially in border areas, statistics show that women have a higher average level of education than men and engage in paid employment even after marriage, with over 92% of women continuing to work.

However, the home is a safe haven and a place for respite from daily life. Cleanliness and organization in the home are essential. When both partners work and return home, conflicts about responsibilities—such as who should handle chores—may arise.

There is no definitive answer to this issue as it requires discussion and agreement between both partners. In Islam, although providing for the family is primarily the husband’s duty and caring for the home and children is primarily the wife’s duty, we see that Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) regularly assisted his wives with household tasks. This shows that both parties can support each other in duties that are not primarily their own.

For couples where both partners work, reaching an agreement early on can make the home more harmonious. If both partners must work to provide for the family, options such as “sharing household tasks” or “hiring a housekeeper” may be the most practical solutions. A clean and organized home is essential to creating a welcoming environment where one feels happy to return after a long day.

Hiring a housekeeper should be a primary option if both partners have sufficient income and share the financial responsibilities of the family. Start by hiring a housekeeper on a one-time or daily basis and, if it works well, consider transitioning to weekly or monthly arrangements. If hiring a housekeeper is not possible, it is essential to avoid arguments over household responsibilities by refraining from citing rights and duties. After all, both the wife and husband contribute equally to supporting the family. Allah reminds us to fear Him in matters that both parties demand of each other, emphasizing that claiming any rights should be done with humility and goodwill before Allah in accordance with Islamic principles.

Additionally, enlisting help from relatives—such as parents-in-law—can be another viable solution for managing household chores or child care. However, maintaining personal space and privacy is crucial to avoid discomfort. These arrangements require careful discussion and planning.

If a wife neither works nor manages household chores, mutual consultation is essential. If the husband cannot resolve the issue with his wife, involving her family to address the problem and find solutions before it escalates is advisable. Similarly, if a husband fails to provide for the family, the wife should consult his family to develop a plan to resolve the issue.

Ultimately, effective communication, in line with Islamic principles, is a cornerstone of a harmonious marriage. Many aspects of married life require planning before beginning a life together. Today, ARAYA NIKAH SOCIAL ENTERPRISE brings you these insights for couples preparing for marriage.

Currently, the company offers a monthly Muslim Family Planning or Nikah Preparation Course, which includes topics on religion, family planning, finances, and legal matters. Feel free to contact us via our page for more information. See you in class!